What could possibly be more excruciating than a Saturn Transit? Well, maybe Pluto, but that’s another story.
Wherever Saturn transits, that is the area of our lives requiring realistic and practical solutions. Concomitant with reality are limitations: life is an exercise in limitations, and Saturn represents that which forces us to choose between what we must have and what we want to have.
Saturn is about to transit my MC, and its passage through the Ninth with Pluto has been grinding me down to poverty and soon homelessness: I have been in a severe and deep conflict with the English education industry for many years now, and I am slowly being bled dry.
As it happens I have some excellent friends who are supporting me to finally leave this nightmare of non-existent integrity and hopelessly unprofessionalism, and being forced to stand upon my own two feet. As Mars sweeps through the Ninth, passed the MC and into the 10th, I will be in a situation where I cannot but learn to depend upon myself, and build my own future based on my values and principles.
By failing to pursue the opportunities to leave this industry and country over the past two years, the forces which oppose me – this xenophobic country and consumerist industry – have been building to a point of breaking me. Saturn indicates that I must now make a final decision about what I choose to base my status upon: duty to others, or duty to myself.
All through my childhood, I devoted myself to helping my mother in support of the family. It takes a lot of work to simply manage a household with three children, especially when there is only one parent who necessarily must earn money. I knew from a young age that I needed to help my mother.
Interestingly, this dynamic is reflected in my current situation, where I am being pressured into devoting myself to someone else. Yet, this time, I am an adult and have my own life which will be severely impacted if I capitulate, supporting someone I do not respect in an industry built on false positives.
Saturn always represents a choice, the choice being to evolve or regress. The Saturn Return is the time at which we must choose to either continue as we have over the previous 29 years, or to step forward and take on the increasing responsibilities of being responsible to ourselves. Every significant Saturn Transit reflects periods in our lives where we must make a choice.
I have made the choice to move into an increased shouldering of responsibility not for others, but for myself. I have spent the past 18 years developing the professional skills to support other’s personal development, and now I choose to begin to support my own.
The price I pay for this is everything: I lose my income, my home, many familiar connections and friends, and the life I have built in Japan until now. This price is very high. The benefit is my soul. The price is worth it.